My Own Minutiae
by doctorcoffeeboy
Summary: A selection of factoids in 10 point chapters about our favourite Consulting Detective and good Doctor. Yea, sorta borrowed idea, but my own facts. R&R!
1. Chapter 1

A/N: A list of things based strongly on 'Minutiae or 156 things about you'. Each point about Sherlock is loosely or stupidly strongly based on me, and each one on John likewise based on my friend, who is to me what John is to Sherlock.

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* John had known himself to be Bisexual since the age of 7, when he'd started crushing on boys and girls alike in the school playground. His parents assumed he'd grow out of it but he never did. They still tried to steer him towards girls as he grew up though, just so they could maybe have some grandchildren. Then he met Sherlock Holmes.

* Sherlock had been Bisexual most of his life, but cannot for the life of him explain a clarifying moment. He'd always claimed if he were a girl, (don't you dare try to imagine it. Seriously. Stop.) he'd be with his primary boarding school friend Peter in a relationship. No-one had taken him seriously of course, but he hadn't joked about that stuff, even at a young age. So, around the age of 14, he'd classed himself Asexual, having discovered conversations about 'who's fit' and who people had slept with really didn't interest or make sense to him. He carried that title until he met John Watson.

* John, bless him, is a major fan of all the Harry Potter media and merchandise. He owns a Gryffindor tie, for God's sake. He's seen all the films the night they came out, loving the hype of lining up, the thrill of seeing it for the first time in a dark cinema surrounded by people feeling exactly the same. It's the highlight of his cinema going-life. He usually goes with family or something, but when the final _ever_ film came out in the cinema, and Sherlock admitted to having only seen _Prisoner of Azkaban, Goblet of Fire,_ and possibly _Half Blood Prince_ (he couldn't remember if he had seen it first on DVD or if he'd gone to the cinema), and none of these had been on the first night, John had practically _dragged_ Sherlock along to the cinema on the release night of _Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part Two_. It seemed fitting to see the finale with the person he wanted to spend the rest of his life with. Something they could both look back on together.

* Sherlock didn't like it when John cried. Especially when there was nothing Sherlock could do about it. At the previously mentioned cinema trip, from the character death of John's favourite Character (you'll have to wait for that, Sherlock doesn't talk about it because he knows it upsets John) to the final scene, with the classic Potter Theme, John had been crying softly into Sherlock's shoulder. It was a cinema, so Sherlock had to refrain from downright turning and kissing John all over his bloody pretty face, or kissing away the tears, so all he could do to try and stop his loves tears was to keep tight hold of his hand and gently pressed kisses along the knuckles or back of the hand, and be silently thrilled when John did the same, albeit shakily. The tears had soaked Sherlock's left sleeve, but he didn't mind, because all he could think about was how the sound of John crying was the most upsetting sound he'd ever had to experience, and he'd do anything in his power to stop it in future.

* You'd have thought, what with being a classic Brit, having served his time for Queen and Country and all that, that John could make tea efficiently without scorching himself or something. That was generally Sherlock's job. But no. It had taken Sherlock about 1 week to realise John was … _special_ … at making tea. Most people, when making tea, press the teabag against the edge of the cup to force out the dark liquid, or swirl said teabag around the cup with the teaspoon to release the taste. Or both. John? No. John's unique in that he instead lifts the tea on the teaspoon out of the cup and uses his thumb the press down on the teabag and gets the juice out that way. Sherlock wouldn't have noticed if John hadn't emitted hisses of pain each time he did it. Apparently he was just 'trying to strengthen my pain receptors to make them stronger' or something. Sherlock had even carefully shown him how Mycroft had taught him to make tea, the real way, but John still did it his own painful way.

* Sherlock occasionally tries making tea the way John does, and can't for the life of him work out why John does it and why he himself tries it, yet he continues to do so, but only when John's out. He always ends up having to run his thumb and forefinger under the tap. Each time, Sherlock notes how it doesn't seem to get better, and this must be how John feels every time he makes tea. Sherlock makes a note to only ask for coffee now, unless he's in the kitchen, in which case he stops John doing it and does it himself, because Sherlock hates seeing John in any form of pain or emotional distress, as mentioned.

* John's parents are great. They really are. They accept Sherlock, they accept Sherlock being with John, and when Sherlock and John had visited John's parents for a week, they'd both spent a majority of time in John's attic, with a couch the moved into a bed, and a TV. John's Mother had even yelled 'stop snogging and come here a moment', and laughed at Sherlock's instant reaction of 'as if!', claiming he'd said it too fast. Sherlock requested John's parents become his own, but John stopped him, saying they couldn't be related, because that would be incest. John's mother had suggested 'honorary' parents, so now, unofficially, Sherlock is John's brother, but not by blood, so relationships are fine.

* What John had really been doing that time his Mother had called them and said 'stop snogging' was trying to place his feet on the slanted ceiling above the couch-bed in the attic to prove he could walk on the ceiling. He'd discovered this 'skill' at a young age when he was bored, on said couch, and wondering if he could balance on his back with his legs along the back of the couch and feet on the ceiling, as if to defy the laws of gravity. Sherlock had been watching and laughing.

* When he's thinking, Sherlock stares at a particular point, and past that point to not really focus at anything. He doesn't make a noise, and steeples his fingertips subconsciously. He is almost always conscious of what's being said around him, although people don't know that, and sometimes he just does it not to concentrate on a case, but to clear his mind, which is no mean feat, of course. Also, a friend once claimed he was fascinating to watch whilst he was thinking, although he can never understand why.

* When John is thinking, he actually sticks his tongue out. It's adorable, and Sherlock is always transfixed by it and tempted to poke it or something. But if he mentions it, John will shy away and his tongue will retreat. So Sherlock stays quiet.


	2. Chapter 2

* Sometimes, for no reason at all, Sherlock will dig out his set of bandages and use them on himself. No, not like that. He'd bandage up his foot, or, as most recent, his hand. He doesn't know why he does it, but he doesn't tell anyone. If it's on his foot, he just puts his sock on over it. If it's his hand, he'll wear a glove or something. Part of him suspects it's because he likes the idea of being injured enough for a bandage, but rarely actually needs one.

* You wouldn't know it to look at him, would you? If you saw John Watson in the street, or had a conversation, you wouldn't know what a filthy mind he had. 'That's what she said' being a regular line in his vocabulary. _Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 1_, for example. Yes, he really does love those films. When Harry is seeing something happening to you-know-wh - to Voldermort, and all we see is Harry gasping and closing his eyes? John started giggling, quietly asking Sherlock 'what's Draco doing?' Yes, John is a Drarry supporter, but don't tell him you know.

* Speaking of 'that's what She said', Sherlock quietly had his own version, one that he never uses out loud, but still makes him chuckle. 'That's what _John_ said'.

* John's room is generally messy, which is surprising really, what with him having Army in his blood. Sherlock quietly thinks it's because having a messy room is his own way of reminding himself that he's not in Afghanistan any more. Or at boot camp. There, he'd have had to keep his belongings tidy, but now he was at 221B, which had hardly any order to it's layout or occupant – nicotine patches in a slipper or science experiments in the kitchen, for example – he could be as untidy as possible. The floor was usually covered in various items, and his bed tended to be covered in papers or something. Of course, this lead to him sometimes not being able to find things, and blaming Sherlock, who was the reason for said loss only 8 out of 10 times.

* Speaking of surprising, Sherlock's room is actually rather neat, if incredibly loud and cluttered. His room wasn't the largest in the house, yet he had a clothing rack – having found wardrobes too normal, a bookshelf full of various reference books from 'Pirates and Privateers' to 'the continuum encyclopaedia of Symbols', with many Crime/Forensic books between. And a few books on Latin, including a dictionary. His bed was usually clean and well made, mostly because he didn't sleep in it, favouring his chair in the corner or the floor, or the top of the bed covers.

* Don't tell Sherlock, but John actually rather likes it when Sherlock get's distracted by something in the street and pulls John by the hand off course to look at things. The most recent went something along the lines of this: John and Sherlock were in town, hand in hand, and John had been waiting to use the cash machine. Sherlock caught sight of a forensic book he didn't have just to the left of them and instantly dashed towards it, forgetting he was attached to John, who was dragged unceremoniously along behind the Consulting Detective. John had been smiling anyway, quite enjoying the rush of wind as he was suddenly pulled along at any moment, but he'll never tell Sherlock.

* He may not look it, but Sherlock actually has a very fragile ego. I know, difficult to understand, right? That's how good his acting is. Throw an insult at Sherlock like 'freak' or 'gay' and Sherlock will reply quickly with some comment about your love life, or a private problem, looking as if the insult had just skipped him, but only John noticed the slight tense of his shoulders, the ever-so-subtle look of hurt for the slightest moment before he recovers. He sometimes worries for his health, knowing he can go from cocky as usual to a ball of tears in a matter or moments depending on what people say. But he only ever does this when he's alone. And if someone else finds out, he will deny all knowledge. Even to John. But he knows John knows he's lying.

* John has this spectacular skill, maybe it comes from his being a Doctor, therefore knowing how Galen, the Greek doctor, used observation as a main skill, and living with Sherlock for so long of course, but John always knows when something is wrong with Sherlock. If Sherlock is asked by Lestrade to have a quiet word alone, Sherlock will do so willingly, leaving John far enough away for him not to hear, and when Lestrade is done dispensing his slightly upsetting or shocking news, Sherlock will return to John, his expression that blank one he favours so well. The sequence of events then goes something like: 'Is everything alright Sherlock?' "Of course. Why wouldn't it be?" *Smiles, takes John's hand as usual, starts walking* 'No…something's up.' *Sherlock shakes head* "Nothing's wrong. Honestly." 'But you've gone all tensed in your shoulders, your voice is slightly different, and your eyes aren't so calm. You're hiding something.' "It's nothing for us to worry about. It's not our problem." *Kisses John's hand in his. Smiles reassuringly* 'Then what are you hiding it for?' "I knew I shouldn't have taught you to deduct…"

* Sherlock has this habit of refusing to do as he's told, and it spreads to not always doing as John says either. Sometimes, yes, but if it's one of _those_ days, Sherlock just really can't be asked. That's when John's Authoritative Voice happens. "I don't want to get up." 'Sherlock. Get up now.' "I don't want to." 'Well, I _want _you to want to.' *death glare* Sherlock will never admit it, but he secretly loves Authoritative John, and occasionally does all he can to provoke him into existence, just for a moment.

* John isn't one to laugh. He's a giggler. Don't believe me? Remember the first night with Sherlock? After chasing a cab to find the passenger not being a killer? Yea, before they worked out it was the Cabbie. When they got back to Baker Street, and said that was the most ridiculous thing he'd ever done, and Sherlock replied he'd invaded Afghanistan? John had giggled. And later that night, or the next, after he'd shot said cabbie, and Sherlock had stated he wasn't the one who'd shot him, John had giggled again. As of that moment, Sherlock tried to get him to giggle whenever possible, mostly because he'd found that occasionally, when John started giggling, he couldn't stop for approximately 20 seconds, and Sherlock loved every millisecond of those moments.

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**A/N: So yea. I do in fact only a continuum Encyclopaedia of Symbols, and a Pirates & Privateers book. I've actually managed to get a few of my friends who don't even **_**watch**_ **Sherlock to use 'that's what John said'. Review please! **

**Oh, Fae Fae, OG or Sgt. Wall? I'm alive, don't worry! My internet is sort of non-existant right now is all, but don't panic. Hope you lot are alright, don't miss me too much! I'm thinking of buying a Wiggles DVD from Asda for Petulant!Sherlock. It's only a fiver… **


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: Well, **_**Arrow 'Nash**_**, you asked for more, right? And anyone else who is reading and not reviewing…what ever. Here's some more for you all!**

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* Don't judge him, okay? Promise? Well… You know how Sherlock, being an adult, doesn't really think of buying socks and things? He still has socks from his younger days. His most embarrassing? Black socks with the Blue Power Ranger on them, and 'Ranger Up!' around the Ranger, who is in a sort of Superman pose. John asked him about them, Sherlock muttered that he preferred Red ranger, but they only had blue. He still wears them as often as possible, despite the sniggers he gets from John.

* John likes Mika. There. It's out there. He knows the words, and _God Damn_, does he sing them. Sherlock thinks that sometimes John must forget Sherlock can hear, because singing '_I can be brown, I can be blue_' ect; in increasing pitch and managing to stay in tune is a skill.

* Sherlock has always like the book 'The Hobbit', by JRR Tolkien. His Mummy used to read it to him when he was younger. He'd always had a tone of affection for Bilbo, but couldn't help but like Smaug, the Dragon. He's not quite sure why, but he can really imagine John dressed in a baggy shirt with braces, beige three quarter lengths and sort of sandy coloured messy hair. Plus, he's the right height.

* John is ticklish _everywhere_. Sherlock found out within days of John moving in, that if you poke his shoulder, he will giggle. Sherlock then found he could literally do this for hours. The best way to tickle him is to ghost a hand down his arm. But you didn't need to know that, did you?

* It's annoying. It really is. John just grins or giggles when you poke his arm, which is adorable, and it's fine. But Sherlock? Of course it's more dramatic. There's a point, towards the middle-top of the gap in his shoulders blades where, when pressed, Sherlock impulsively cringes his shoulders back and whimpers slightly, or inhales sharply. It always takes a few seconds for this shoulders to relax, before John does it again. So John told Lestrade.

* John is rather skilled at games such as 'just dance', on the X-box. He doesn't know Sherlock knows, but boy does he. He didn't mean to find out. John makes sure to only play it when he knows Sherlock isn't in, just to keep it quiet, but he left out the case one day. Turns out, John's quite high in ranks and scores, and hardly misses a point. Odd, to imagine John playing games designed for teenage girls, but there you have it.

* Sherlock can't stand Drum & Bass music. Or Techno crap. His deep loathing comes from a short-lived bus journey in midday London. There had been a rare taxi strike, and Sherlock needed to get across London for a case. The underground was too far away and he needed it now _(That's what John said –SH)_. So he'd climbed hesitantly onto a bus and remained standing at the front, his whole stature saying 'don't even touch me'. Then the Chavs – no other word for it – started playing Pendulum. He knew who it because they decided to by naming the band and song – Witchcraft. Needless to say he got of the next stop and walked.

* Don't ask why unless you want a rant, but John can't stand Nicolas Cage's face. To the point of having to look away whenever he's on screen or downright changing the channel/film. Sherlock tried asking why, but all he remembers from the answer is 'annoying face'. Since then, he's tagged Nicolas Cage with Anderson.

* Sherlock's first contact with dead things and experiments was at school in year 10 Science. They'd run out of gloves and the teacher was about to stop him taking part when Sherlock stated that the teacher herself hadn't used gloves, so why couldn't he? She'd finally agreed, and given Sherlock a cow heart, a scalpel, and some other tools. They'd had to put their finger through the subclavian artery, and Sherlock did so without so much as a whimper of sickness, whilst the other kids, with gloves, were squirming. The teacher had been a little unnerved by how carefully he cut the heart up, and how fascinated he was with it. And that he asked to take it home.

* John was _that_ _kid_ when he in school. The nerdy one that gets high grades, wears his uniform correctly and finishes all his work. To prove this point even more, when John Watson had a buzz at home, he didn't go and exercise or run around or play computer games…he did his homework…

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**A/N: The second to last? About Sherlock and the heart? True. I didn't use gloves and asked to take it home. I worry about myself sometimes. Honestly. **


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: Seems I just can't keep my mind off of these things! **

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* Everyone has their ways of winding down before they go to sleep. Like listening to music or reading part of a novel. Sherlock does a Sudoku on his phone, varying between levels 'easy' and 'intermediate'. Not what most people do, granted, but there it is. He makes his brain work on numbers to de-stress.

* John reads books to settle down, occasionally with a lolly pop, but that's a different story for a different day. He is currently reading a centuries old book called 'Bedtime Stories' by Hazell Watson. He's not sure if there is a relation.

* Believe it or not, Sherlock is capable of liking more genres than Crime/Mystery. He's rather an avid fan of sci-fi, his favourites being Star Wars and Back to the Future, of course. Not to mention Doctor Who and Torchwood. But he won't admit it unless you catch him watching it, and then he'll try and argue his way out of it ("It's for a case, John! Honestly! Um…the case of…who River Song is…"). He's also rather a fan of a good Zombocalypse movie.

* John…well, he hates Zombies. The moves are okay, he will watch them, but they tend to niggle at his subconscious for a week or so after watching them. He can get through Afghanistan, but a movie about the living dead has him on edge. Sherlock finds this highly amusing, of course, and teases him occasionally. Until John mentions Doctor Who. Then he shuts up.

* If you were to ask Sherlock his favourite weather, his answer will vary, but always stay around the same _type_. Torrential Rain is his current favourite. But close behind that are; Thunder and Lightening, the days when the sky is completely white, like someone has put a sheet of paper over the sky ("Even the sky doesn't know what to do with the day…"), or when they sky is covered in greyish clouds, lending an air of the Victorian Age, to which Sherlock has a particular fondness.

* John likes the rain. He finds it refreshing. Mostly because of how clean the air feels, but Sherlock suspects he likes the soft drizzle on his face, seen as how he always smiled at it.

* Sherlock has a tendency to walk in the middle of empty roads, just to relish the feeling of walking somewhere other than the sidewalk. But only the once has this proved dangerous. Usually he is able to hear the car and move out of the way, but one time he was explaining a case to Lestrade, when a motorbike flew out of nowhere doing around 57 mph. Sherlock would have been hit if Lestrade hadn't grabbed the back of his coat and hauled him out of the way.

* Like Sherlock's view of the weather, John's favourite food varies from week to week. If you asked him, his impulse answer would obviously be 'JAM!', or anything that contained it, but honestly? Chicken Satay sticks. The first time Sherlock saw John eat these, he was a little shocked at how blissful John's expression became, to the point of stopping Sherlock mid sentence so he could finish his Satay in peace.

* Record players, tape players, paintings. Sherlock likes old things. He's not sure why. It's not like he hates gadgets, lord, have you seen the way his fingers fly over his blackberry? Where would he be without DNA analysis and state-of-the-art microscopes? He's completely in tune with the modern age, yet has a part of him that leans towards the Victorian, or just the old fashioned. Mycroft used to say he was born out of his time. He should have been born earlier. Actually, the phrase he used was 'anachronistic freak from the past'. Sherlock has to agree on every word.

* John is wary of alleyways. Not because of a murderer, or the war, but because of Zombies. Stop laughing! Seriously. Sherlock noticed this as they entered an alleyway, perfectly clear afternoon, sun and everything, and John tightened his grip on Sherlock's hand ever-so-slightly. Most people wouldn't notice, he doubted John even noticed, but Sherlock was gifted at noticing the little things, of course. John has to go to every spot two alleys meet, like the crossroads, and peek round the corner, just to check for Zombies. Sherlock hates to imagine what will happen if John is bitten by one, despite his logical brain stating how imaginary they are. But that doesn't stop him worrying a little. Yes, John watched a Zombie film this week. Zombieland, to be precise.

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**A/N: Another lot up for you. I swear, these are just falling out of my brain! I just had an idea for an Angst piece, literally as I write this, so expect that soon… whenever I next get online. **


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N: One more chapter for you all. I just can't keep my hands off this stuff! Apparently this is a sort of 'sleep' chapter…**

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***** John can't wear socks in bed. He says they are 'too constrictive' and insists on using one foot to remove the other sock, or using his hand to partially remove a sock, thus getting both off with his feet.

* Sherlock is easy either way. He owns 'slipper socks', though never wears them out of the house, of course. He has fallen asleep in these, but whether he takes of said socks at night depends on how he's feeling at the time really.

* When John is sleeping, he always has to have his bed slightly away from the wall, to allow himself to breath through said gap and have access to cool air.

* Sherlock's bed isn't even cornered into the wall, it is in the middle of a wall facing out, so he doesn't have a problem with air. Besides, breathing is boring, remember?

* Since as long as he can remember, John has always had to have his feet covered in bed, this has continued even to now. He's not entirely sure why, unless you count the childhood fear of something 'getting' him at night…A fact which Sherlock laughed over for a fair while until John showed him the Doctor Who episode 'Night Terrors' by Mark Gatiss, who, coincidently, is Mycroft's pen name.

* Occasionally, Sherlock sleeps with part of his body _out_ of the covers. Not for any particular reason, just because he can. And Mummy used to tell him not to. For the same reason, he sometimes sleeps facing down.

* John's longest serving toy is Mr. Cornelius Rumple. It was a gift from his (fairy) godmother the day he was born and has breathable fabric, so that he didn't suffocate. Mr. Rumple has stuck with John through everything, apart from that time when he lived under John's bed unnoticed for a while…

* Sherlock has 'Johnbear', but don't tell John. It's one of those toys from the Teddy Bear Factory. He got it in London on a history trip when he was 14. It has sandy hair and is really soft, and gets warm when you hug it for long enough. The man that gave him it requested he kiss the little red felt heart that went inside, rubbed said heart on his eyes to give the bear sight, ears to let it hear, nose to make it smell, lips to let it taste, legs to make it fast ect; It got to the point where Sherlock stated the man was just making it up, and stopped. The bear was unnamed for years, until Sherlock met John. If he couldn't have John to sleep next to, he would have Johnbear. As a result, Johnbear is now a rather ragged thing, but Sherlock still loves him.

* If John sleeps in his day-clothes, namely his jumper, he feels ill the next day. He isn't literally, just something in his mind makes him think he is. His throat goes all funny, and he acquires a strange taste in his mouth. Something he wonders due to this what Sherlock has been doing to him…

* Sherlock, on the other hand, is perfectly capable of sleeping in day clothes, and does so regularly, just because he A) can't be bothered to change out of them and B) He knows he has an early start the next day so gets changed for it before going to sleep. Without the shoes, obviously. That's ridiculous. As for John's suspicions? They are completely untrue. Honest.

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**A/N: I don't even know why they all were to do with sleep. Well, I did all of Johns, and then filled in Sherlock's, so they were all about sleeping.**

**That thing with Johnbear really happened. The guy made me do **_**so**_** many things, it was almost creepy. The certificate says 'My name is John Watson, I belong to Sherlock Holmes'. The guy at the counter was like "are you 'Sherlock Holmes'?" I nodded. "Is your bear called 'John Watson'?" Another shy nod. I don't think it helped that I was wearing a badge with the Baker Street sign on it. **


	6. Chapter 6

* Sherlock's favourite actors, not in order or whatever, are Robert Downey Jnr (he is honestly just an awesome actor), Jude Law (he was good in Artificial Intelligence…), Alan Davies, Peter Cushing thanks to the Hammer House of Horror shows that he and Mycroft used to love, Jonathan Creek, the _other_ curly haired detective, David Tennant and John Barrowman (Remember the secret love of sci-fi?). Jeremy Brett also, who was brilliant in _My Fair Lady, _despite his brilliant voice being cut and a fake placed over._ Oh_, and Bernard Cribbins, who would just be the most awesome grandfather _ever_.

* John's earliest memory is from when he was about 1½ , and was moving house. He'd gone to his friends house for the last time, and been permitted by said friend to have a little play in his red car, the one with a space for your feet. The name has escaped him, but the memory never will.

* Sherlock has a fairly early memory of Mycroft yelling at him for not spreading Jam on toast properly. Honestly. His brother had asked for Jam on toast, so Sherlock had grudgingly obliged, using a spoon to get out the strawberry Jam and to spread it on the toast. Mycroft had come into the kitchen and told Sherlock off for not doing it right, telling him he was stupid. Sherlock had petulantly retorted that he wasn't stupid, and stormed out of the kitchen. He then waited a fair few weeks before making Mycroft any form of food, and avoided Jam on toast, because he was worried Mycroft would yell again.

* If John eats too many sugary sweets (such as Tangfastics), he begins to feel ill. That is, unless he has some water, then he's okay.

* Sherlock, on the other hand, can eat as many sugary sweets as he wants, but will secretly regret it later. Such as when he ate half a pot of Strawberry Jam in one sitting, on it's own, and then got a stomach ache from Jam Overdose. Has he learnt from his lessons? Not likely.

* Johns favourite TV show is Merlin. Yes, the one with Colin Morgan and Bradley James. John often compares Sherlock with Colin, he says it's because of the bone structure, but really it's because he crushes on Colin. John, that is. Not Sherlock…

* Sherlock's favourite TV show is Psych or Mentalist. Or NCIS. He likes the detective shows, obviously. Psych is just cheesy and brilliant and funny. Mentalist is purely genius, and NCIS has terrific plotlines and…and…you know what? It's just because he likes working out who did it as fast as possible, and understanding all the Forensic stuff from Abby Shuto. Not to mention House, Jonathan Creek and… ahem… Doctor Who.

* John's favoured music is classical when he's trying to be creative or concentrate, but mainly just pop. Don't hate him, just because he knows all the words to 'Friday' by Rebecca Black. _(It's just catchy, I agree her voice is terrible! ~John.) _Yea, I know. Just don't.

* Sherlock is, as we've said before, an 'Anachronistic freak from the past' so he's more likely to listen to bands from the 80s, seen as he feels like he should have been born twenty years before he was. Morrissey, David Bowie, the Cramps…and of course the modern things like The Hoosiers, My Chemical Romance (_They have just lived through so much, they're so inspirational -SH_), Panic! At The Disco and Robert Downey Jnr…

* John has discovered that Sherlock has a definite obsession with Robert Downey Jnr. He doesn't know exactly how far his Fangirling extends and he's not quite sure he wants to know.

* _It's not an obsession. I just happen to have a collage, a poster, a CD and several DVDs. Shut up. No really. –SH_

_* Is it Gay Porn? Which is fine, by the way. –JW_

_* No! Well…does the opening scene from Tropic Thunder count? –SH_

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**A/N: Well yea. Apologies for the last few bits, Sherlock and John were having a domestic. John was jealous of Sherlock's vast gay porn collection. It includes 'Ali G' purely because of Johns' character and the **_**one**_** scene towards the end in the locked room. Love Actually is in there also, because John is a stand in porn star. **_**(Not jealous. I know where the key is. –JW)**_****

**Reviews? PLEASE?**


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N: Not much by way of me and my John here, mostly a Benedict/Martin thing, except from 8 onwards. **

* Both men have secrets. Sherlock Holmes is secretly an actor who calls himself Benedict Timothy Carlton Cumberbatch. He's had a number of roles under this name, including a rapist in Atonement and a young man in 'fortysomething'. Other roles have been in Amazing Grace, never mind the buzzcocks and, most recently, Peter Guillam, a gay agent in Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy. As this actor, Sherlock is ginger, charming, warm hearted and thoughtful of others. In short, he is a complete lie.

* John's a secret actor too, except his name isn't so perfect and 'only-_he_-could-pull-off-a-name-like-that'. John, sticking with 'normal' names, is Martin Freeman. As this man John has done many comedy roles. Best known for 'Tim' in The Office and 'Arthur Dent' in Hitchhikers Guide To The Galaxy. For Love Actually and Ali G, in which he plays a stand in porn star named, wait for it, _John_, and Ricky C respectively, we see John having (or pretending to have) sex. Lesser parts are 'Declan' in Shaun of the Dead (A silent cameo as a favour to Simon Pegg, a friend of his), a Doctor in Black Books, a police sergeant in Hot Fuzz and an _old_ noodles advert. Oh, and Mr Maddens in Nativity. Sherlock has never laughed so much at a film.

* Sherlock owns every film and interview with 'Martin Freeman' and most enjoys Ali G, not only does he get to see John in plastic yellow dungarees and a vest with a Chav accent, but John's character is caught having sex. He's the 'giver' so to speak. Oh, how many times Sherlock has paused that shot…

* Sherlock doesn't know John knows about his radio role as Martin Crieff in 'Cabin Pressure'. Sherlock is an uptight pilot in his early twenties who is insecure, picked on by his boss and always in his co-pilots shadow. Bless. He plays it so well John wonders if he has such life as a memory. He is 7 years younger than Mycroft after all, who is smarter…

* Sherlock has a fair few muscles, from running and the like. His chest is fairly defined. Not enough to be called 'in shape completely' but enough.

* John's chest is completely smooth and hair-free, adding to his 12-year-old persona. He has muscled also, from his army days, but Sherlock doesn't see them much because of the, you know. He doesn't like to talk about it.

* As a teen, whenever his Uncle Clifford visited, Sherlock would be well dressed with a book in his hand (usually on forensics or a mystery book) as he sat in the corner of the room, talking if needed but usually staying out of the boring conversations. His Uncle asked once why he wasn't out in the nice warm sunshine, exploring or something. Sherlock explained that he preferred being indoors and could get all the sunlight he needed through his bedroom window. His point still stands.

* John, sadly, never really had friends outside school to hang with, until year 10. Even then they stayed indoors. The weather his end was mostly crap anyway.

* The worst part of Sherlock's school days was Tutor Time. He only really had two friends in his class and they always spoke to each other or went away for some excuse or another. He was the outcast of his friends. But in that case, he's finish a book, deduct the class or stare into space. So when he received an option for a parent/tutor evening, he ignored, knowing what his tutor would say: 'too quiet, doesn't interact with lessons, isn't willing to join games'. They weren't games, they were memory puzzles or word-play games that were too obvious and not worth his time.

* John knows all the words to 'down with the trumpets' by Rizzle Kicks. Not Sherlock's kind of music, but whenever he hears the song, he can't help but smile and imagine John dancing to himself as he sang along. Sherlock walked in on John watching the music video once and dancing, albeit badly, as he sang. That image will never leave.

**A/N: **_**Skyfullofstars**_**, you mentioned loving these? Thought I'd chuck another one for you. Written and completed at 11pm last night and typed up at 6;30 this morning. Be happy with this. **


	8. Chapter 8

A/N: First things first, gotta help out a disgruntled Fanfiction Irregular. _, I know you told me that you didn't think Sherlock would be an NCIS fan or any other cop/detective shows, but I said at the beginning of this whole thing that this was 'loosely or strongly based on me and my friend, who is to me what John is to Sherlock'. I'm sorry if my interpretation of Sherlock isn't to your liking, I'll try to stay in character in the future. Thankyou for the comment about Jeremy Brett though. Much appreciated and I hope we've cleared up any problems you may have had.

**Everyone else, your reviews are so inspiring! I'm loving every single one! Sorry I'm not replying to you all, but I'm not ignoring you either. **

_**Arrow 'Nash**_**? Check your PM. **

**XxXxXxX**

* Sherlock, as previously mentioned, has a tendency to test his mortality by walking in the middle of roads. This started when he was explaining something in detail to Lestrade last year, before John, and walked into the path of a motorbike. Lestrade yanked the back of his coat out of the way, and since then Sherlock has been fascinated by the idea of possibly being injured by walking where vehicles should run. John strongly suggests he just likes feeling all powerful because he's somewhere people usually aren't.

* John loves Sherlock's hair, when it's straightened. He honestly does. But just sometimes, from the wrong angle, the worst angle possible, John thinks he looks like Anderson. This fills him with horror and so he begs Sherlock to do something about said hair. Never straighten it again perhaps, or get it cut back to when they'd first met.

* Sherlock never really had time for exams. He found them dull. His parents once insisted he go to a party for Mycroft's 22nd birthday, when Sherlock was still 15, and Mycroft didn't show until half 8 in the evening, while Sherlock had been putting up with his grandparents since he got back from school at half 3. They didn't get home until 11.30 and Sherlock didn't fall asleep until half twelve. The next day, the day of an important English test, the night had taken its toll and Sherlock almost fell asleep at the desk twice. He doesn't like clubs, especially the Diogenes, which he avoids at all costs.

* John usually leaves his phone in a different room or on silent. Sherlock suspects this is because he is sick of being plagued by texts.

* Sherlock, on the other hand, hates being away from his phone, even without credit. The idea that he should be unreachable, even for 20 minutes, maddens him. What if a delicious murder occurs and he doesn't know about it straight away? The last time he left him phone at home and went outside, he spent the next 40 minutes on edge. When he got home, he'd missed two calls from John and received a worried text, with John panicking and worried he'd done something wrong or Sherlock was injured. Sherlock has never wanted credit more in his life.

* Sherlock has found one of the oddest photos ever of John's old school class. It's about year three, John is in the middle row, towards the centre, and his eyes are wide, head back a little and mouth completely open in some weird silent scream. On some levels it's adorable, but on others it's like he's from the Omen. Sherlock is mostly confused as to what the hell he was doing! Was he trying to smile the biggest smile or just show everyone how large he can open his mouth? Sherlock knows he can fit a fist in it.

* For the year 11 school photos, the final year before College, Sherlock and a close friend of his, Abby, were graced to stand next to each other. They were squashed in amongst various other kids in their year, and sectioned of from their friends in a sea of 'populars'. So they sang a few songs, much to the annoyance of nearby students. When the photo was taken, on queue, Sherlock and Abby glanced towards each other, a smirk on their face and an eyebrow raised. That will be in the school photo forever. And they couldn't be prouder.

* John is very open about his relationship status. He wants people to know that he's with the most beautiful person on earth, let alone their area of England. And people accept it, moving on with life. They know he's bisexual, it's fine.

* Sherlock told a few colleagues, but not his family. It's not that he's not ridiculously proud of John, but he doesn't know how he'd go about telling them. He's a bit awkward, obviously. Soon, he'll tell them soon.

* John fits perfectly on Sherlock's lap, further proof of his 12-year-old figure. Of course, he objects to being called 12, but Sherlock suspects he likes it really.

A/N: Taa-daaaa! I tried to stay in character. Sorry if not, I'm starting to run low on things about you. John, could you PM me a list?

OG, you haven't replied to my message? Tell me what Moffatt said? I feel all neglected. You know about my abandonment issues!

**Fae Fae, dear, hope you're doing well! You too Sgt. Wall! *salutes***

**Reviews are like coffee, they keep me happy! **


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